My 2019

Oh my lord, I can’t quite believe I have finally got round to posting this. Don’t laugh, but I have been meaning to write this post since the end of the summer. No real excuse except in the words of Ferris Bueller - life does move pretty fast - and for me, this year has flown by at lightning speed.  

So what did 2019 hold for me?  I am going to go against my natural rambly state and get to the point. Here is what I think is a decent summation of my year, in chronological order: 

I turned 50, moved into my own home, put on a gig, moved out of my new home to renovate it, got divorced, finished an album, fell in love, moved back into my house, watched my daughter graduate from University, signed a licensing deal with independent record label, Frtyfve, put on another gig, celebrated my son turning 21, started an online campaign to release my new music, went to Melbourne for nearly a month (part work/part pleasure), came back at the beginning of November and had to press pause on life as my son was severely ill and in hospital for 10 days. 

I spent the beginning of December catching up with work and on 22nd I flew to Frankfurt for my first German Christmas. A side note - I suffered a massive allergic reaction four days before I flew to Germany and got on the plane barely able to walk (I’m not exaggerating - I was covered from the neck down in an angry, sore, stinging rash that was also the soles of my feet which prevented me from walking - and had to get around the airport in a wheelchair :( ). 

Luckily the German doctor I saw prescribed a heady cocktail of antihistamines and cortisone that set me on the road to recovery and as I write now I am in Marrakech for the first time ever, for a few days of relaxation and to celebrate the New Year.

Before I go any further, the mother in me has to state that after a truly horrendous time, my son is well again. There was a five day period, when he was in hospital that I feared the worst as the drs were unable to diagnose his illness and he was worsening day on day. But I will address this in another post as I learned a lot about myself and the harsh reality that the worry as a parent never goes away. 

If I dial back to 2018, I remember it being a year where I was clearer on what I wanted to achieve creatively and who I am as an artist. 

This certainly gathered momentum in 2019. But in addition - due in part to the emotional rollercoaster that weaved its way through my year - 2019 has clarified who I am and who I want to be - how I choose to conduct myself and what I value in the people around me. This might sound a little airy fairy or silly but who I am on a personal level directly feeds into the artist in me, it always has done and always will.

I have probably said this before but emotion and connection are my strongest drivers. This year I have finally gained the ability to be a little more discerning about how I want to spend my time and not being scared to release things that do not serve me anymore.

My music and my children continue to be my life blood. I honestly don’t think I could survive without them. 

My daughter starts work in January for a children’s charity - which has been her absolute dream job for years. She has never wanted to compromise on her goal, and her tenacity and determination inspire me daily. 

My son, a second year English and Film student typically burns the candle at both ends - his talent and passion for everything he does also inspires me especially his commitment to raising money and awareness for Mental Health UK and being part of his Uni committee for Movember. 

Releasing new music is one of my greatest thrills, and last week I released my EP “Out of the Shadows”. This is a body of work I have wanted to create for years and I am really proud of it. A massive thank you to everyone involved and to you for listening. 

And whilst my blog hasn’t had the love it deserves this year, it will be back with some regularity in 2020. Season 2 of my podcast series, About Last Night, will also be back. 

One more thing -  I said earlier 2019 has been an emotional rollercoaster. It has been, and it took me a while to acknowledge that and allow myself to process the year’s events. 

It has been a year of massive personal and even spiritual growth which I feel must be really good thing. This year more than ever I have never been so thankful for my unrelenting positivity. I don’t know where it comes from and have called it delusional at times but I appreciate it everyday. It is a fire in me that makes me resilient and nurtures a knowing in me that whatever happens - everything will always work out. 

So that’s that. I hope some of this makes sense and gives you a picture of my 2019.

I am so excited for 2020 and everything it holds. I am ready to grab every opportunity that life presents and am planning on getting back into the studio around Easter. And whilst I am not big on New Year’s resolutions, I will do my best to connect and engage with you. I know I am haphazard social networker but please know I appreciate your support and never take your kind comments for granted. 

So all that’s left for me to say is I hope you have had a good year too and wish you all the best for 2020. 

Sending you all loads of love x

Looking back on 2017 – my creative journey…

After rushing headlong to Christmas, like we all do, I have taken a few days to reflect on this year.

I revel in these moments, not because I particularly like looking back, but I like taking stock and I love planning for the future.

2017 has been the most important creative year for me, to date. I am clearer than I have ever been on what I want to achieve as an artist both musically and in a wider creative sense.

My music, and the community I am part of through social networking, and am building through my blog, bring me immense happiness and satisfaction. Everything I do revolves around words and emotion. Words have always and will always matter to me. That’s why I love to write.

You may have heard me say before that in all things - communication and connection are my predominant motivations, always with a healthy sprinkling of positivity. I suppose if I had a mission statement – that would be it. And this year, more than ever, I feel I have stayed true to this.

A lot of this year has been about writing new music. I have never really considered myself a Jazz singer per se, though I have spent many years singing this gorgeous genre almost exclusively. I didn’t go to music school – something that has bothered me for years – but I feel more chilled about that these days.

I am a singer who writes adult contemporary music - a blend of pop, jazz and blues and I am really excited about my new release (Untold Stories, Part 1 - a collaboration with my dear friend and colleague, bassist, Richard Sadler).

It is also the third year of my blog and this year a lot of things have clicked. I have loved the engagement with followers and other brands, and collaborations and friendships it has led to.

Through my blog many people ask about my journey, so in case you don’t know, and are interested, here is an abridged version:

My childhood (I’m an only child) was unequivocally happy but the choices I made, were safe family pleasers (I have two Physics degrees and pursued a career in research, science publishing and journalism for a number of years) which is weird because I knew from the age of 7, I wanted to be a singer and songwriter, writing my first song at 12.

October 2001 was a pivotal month in my life. My father was hospitalized due to a negligent operation and in a matter of hours my life was changed irreparably. My father never returned home and died in 2004.

It never occurred to me that something so traumatic would befall my family. My eyes were open to a darkness I had never contemplated. And if I could save anyone from this kind of sorrow I would.

I was desperate in my need to find something positive because I was drowning.

Life is as wonderful as it is cruel and my children though they were toddlers, were my saviours. I had to get out of bed in the morning for them; and to escape mentally from my father’s deterioration I rediscovered my compulsion and passion for singing and writing.

I think this is why sharing joy is at the core of everything I do and as I look back on this year – there has been plenty of joy.

What I saw with my father created a latent urgency in me – to do everything I want to before it’s too late and before I got too old...I’m not sure why or how but, this year, I have learned to savour what I am doing and enjoy the processes I find myself in – because I can’t live without creativity and nor do I want to.

I have finally realised I don’t have to rush anything and age is not factor.

2017 has been my most consistent year in settling into who I am as a creative and that - puts a big smile on my face.How was 2017 for you? I'd love to know...Creativity is contagious - pass it on – Albert Einstein.

New Music VLOG featuring new single “Did I Tell You?"

So, something a little different this week - a little vlog about my current musical project. Hope you find it interesting and please do let me know what you think x

Gigging on Friday...

So I have been mentioning this on Facebook, Twitter and my IG account and just thought I'd put this poster up here too.

I know full well that lunchtime gigs are hard to get to - but I am so excited to be performing my new material and a few old favourites too that it would be lovely if you were able to come along.

Here's the ticket link if you fancy booking in advance:  http://www.royalalberthall.com/tickets/events/2016/free-friday-music-parry-ray/

Anyway, I am off to do a bit of "la, la laing..." in preparation :) Speak soon x