A rare personal post

Happy Easter all! Hope you are having a glorious weekend whatever you are up to.

So this is a rare personal post, I might do a few more across the year because as a creative my personal and professional lives are pretty interwined, but this one is different as I wanted to publicise something my son is doing.

My son, Josh, is embarking on a crazy a summer of events to raise money for Mental Health UK and I wanted to tell you a little bit about it, from my perspective.

Josh has been playing rugby since he was 4. It is his lifeblood, his religion. Many of you who have loved ones who play rugby will know this mentality, but also know it comes with some serious risks.

And over time Josh has had more than his fair share of injuries – off the top of my head he has suffered a broken ankle, torn ankle ligaments, broken vertebrae, cracked ribs, subluxed shoulder, torn ACL, torn MCL, and I have blanked out the actual number of concussions he has had.

But such his love for this crazy, brutal sport – he rehabs as if his life depends on it so he can be back on the pitch as soon as possible.

Watching him play can be exhilarating. I love to watch him run the length of the pitch and score. He is the king of those champagne tries - I think they are called. But as anyone who watches someone they love play this brutal sport knows when they get injured you stand on the touchline praying they will get to their feet as quickly as possible. And when they don’t you feel beyond sick.

But I have realised over the years that this isn’t about me, or my irrational maternal worry and my worry about his physical health is just one small part of it. After suffering so many injuries and a number of concussions I could see his mood changing dramatically and whilst he didn’t often talk to me about how he was feeling, or what he was going through I knew he was dealing with a whole host of  demons and for a long while, internalising them.

Nowadays, more than ever we are aware of mental health which is a wonderful thing, but I still feel there is a sense of bravado within men and certainly rugby boys to power through and not address how they are feeling.

Over the last few years, Josh has become very open and honest about his journey and his own mental health awareness. And I am immensely proud of him for planning these events to raise money for Mental Health UK. He has also asked me to join him on one of the “easier” events, but I have politely declined as not sure I am up to it!

Ever since Josh was little he has approached everything he wants to do with a great deal of determination, passion and commitment – so I wanted to share the link to his page with you.

I don’t think I have ever put anything like this up before, so if you feel inclined and I hope you do you could donate a little something. Thank you x

https://bit.ly/2UytmpH 

What are you giving up for lent?

So it’s the start of lent tomorrow.

As I understand it - and I will preface with I am not Christian, but did go to Church of England schools - Lent is a time to give things up.

For Christians it is when they remember the time Jesus spent 40 days and 40 nights in the desert being tempted by Satan. As Jesus was fasting during this period, I think this is why Christians associate this time with giving up particular foods…ok that’s about as far as I’m going to go with the religious account.

This is the thing about lent though, and what I find particularly interesting, is these days lent is observed by many people, regardless of their religious identity. It feels like a societal thing, though its root originates in Christianity.

You know the deal, people give up a whole host of things – anything from chocolate, alcohol, pizza, smoking to social networking (apparently!). My daughter has suggested she may give up meat – which I will be very impressed to see. She is, however one of the most determined people I know, so if she says she will, she will.

But this is the thing – I feel the whole concept of giving something up for a prolonged period of time is really laudable and I do believe that if you set your mind to something, it is good to commit. But I am not good at giving up things.

This is primarily why I never diet or do dry January. I can go weeks without drinking, but the minute I tell myself I am not allowed – there is part of my mind that rebels.

But I do like idea of lent, so I have decided to look at it as a period of time where I don’t give something up – but I exercise some sustained discipline. Discipline – I can get on board with – and fuels my personal fire. A subtle distinction I know, but it makes sense to me (!)So I have decided on coffee. I never drink instant coffee, which is what we have at home – but even if I am working from home, I will make a point of going out most days and buying a “posh” coffee.

So not having it for 40 days will be no bad thing and whilst it will be nominal I have decided that I will put the money I would have spent in a jar and give it to charity at the end of lent. I'm feeling focussed...

So how about you? Are you giving up something for lent – what is it? Do you always observe lent, or never? Please get in touch; I’d love to know....

Christmas Boxes - Operation Christmas Child 2016 VLOG

Here's my latest vlog. This is something I used to do years ago and am starting to do again x

It’s time for a closet clear out

I have too many clothes. Mostly beautiful dresses I have collected through the years. I’m a sucker for anything in silk, bright colours and unusual prints. But - there are only 7 days a week so clearly there is a limit to how many clothes I can actually wear.

My biggest problem is I don’t like throwing any piece of clothing away and I pride myself on buying things that are timeless. In fact recently I wore a Collette Dinnigan dress that I bought in Australia when my daughter was born – so 18 years ago. It’s looking pretty good (the dress, not me!) and it has the added allure of being vintage now.

It doesn’t matter if it’s high street or designer, every item of clothing gets lovingly welcomed into the Parry fashion family (!!)So culling does not come naturally. This, coupled with a constant stream of new season pieces that are put online week after week to lure me into buying something new and desirable equals a wardrobe slowly descending into chaos and order needs to be restored.

I have a rough plan in my head with four categories: (a) keeping, (b) too threadbare for anyone so throwing away, (c) charity, and (d) worth selling. But how do I get to the four categories?

1. I have to be ruthless. If I don’t love it and it doesn’t fit perfectly, it needs to go. This is a no-brainer.

2. Focus on my own style. I am a dress girl, and more recently a shirt/skirt girl. The point is I am not a jeans girl. I only have one pair of jeans in my wardrobe. So whilst it is nice to go off road now and again, most of us have our personal style figured out.

3. I must be brutally honest with myself. When I do allow myself to buy something new, I must scan my wardrobe for similar items. We all have a tendency to gravitate towards the same colours and shapes of clothes. But how many black leather pencil skirts does one girl need? In my case - three and that’s more than enough! They actually all fit really well, so they are staying.

4. Use good judgment. I personally do not adhere to the “if you haven’t worn it for two years throw it out", I refer to my Collette Dinnigan dress earlier. We don’t need a cocktail dress every day, but it's good to know there are a few in your wardrobe that fit perfectly, ready for the right occasion. However, if you always sidestep a particular item of clothing for something else, it needs to go.

So, my plan makes perfect sense to me. But I have been thinking about how best to dispatch pieces I want to sell, mainly designer clothes that don’t fit or suit me anymore.

Obviously lots of people sell on eBay and similar sites, and there are services that sell your clothes for you and take a commission. But increasingly I am thinking that whilst I would like to make some money from my beloved wardrobe, I would also like to raise some money for charity. So here’s where I need your input.

Current seedling ideas are setting up my own little online “shop” maybe attached to this blog where I could sell a certain number of clothes for a different charity a month or - what I am veering towards is organising a larger sale event with live music (maybe performed by me and various friends/guests) supporting maybe 5-6 charities that are important to me…I know this sounds like a mish mash, but with a bit of focus I think it might be a great event and worthwhile, would you come? Suggestions, advice and thoughts gratefully received here…