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Parry Ray in Harmony

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The beauty of breath

April 18, 2018

Our ability to breathe is remarkable; I know I’m stating the obvious, but we do it without thinking.

We have the capacity to change our breathing consciously by - gasping or sighing for instance, but we can also affect it subconsciously depending on how we are feeling. Mood is inextricably linked to breath.

Last week, I mentioned on an Instagram post that life has been a little up and down of late. I tend to not let stress get to me, and actually I think I am pretty effective at dealing with a high baseline of stress.

But I know in myself when I am feeding off it in a positive way and when I am not - and I haven’t been lately so I knew I had to do something.

I’m sure like me you have daily practices that punctuate your day, that are good for your general wellbeing. Some people run or go for power walks, others like me start their day with meditation. I also exercise about 4-5 times a week - and of course I sing most days.

But over the last month or so these “good practices” haven’t been as effective as normal. I am doing them but they are not keeping me as balanced as I would like and the more I noticed I wasn’t feeling refreshed after mediating, or I wasn’t using my voice in the way that I wanted, the more annoyed I was getting with myself.

Then last week I realised, it wasn’t what I was doing that was failing me – it was how I was doing it - and specifically how I was breathing.

When I look to my Indian background, most of my extended family practises some sort of yoga. My mother has been doing it since she was at school and now in her 80s, it is still how she starts her day.

Yoga teachers (yogis) have known of the benefits of mindful breathing for centuries. And over the years, scientific research has corroborated these benefits. Paying attention to how we breathe is one of the most effective tools to lower stress levels and improve our mood.

I pride myself on understanding the mechanics and benefits of breathing properly, especially because good breath control is fundamental in singing.

But, and this may sound silly, I have remembered that it is not enough to just breathe; the rate at which we breathe is vital. It is related to the autonomic nervous system which controls our bodies’ sympathetic response (which is the fight or flight thing) and parasympathetic response, which is our rest and restore function, which feeds into our heart rate and respiration, which go up or down depending on whether we are relaxed or stressed or somewhere in between.

Over the last week I have been taking the time to really tap into my breath. There is something beautiful about concentrating on stillness, and tuning into breathing.

I have reminded myself that like so many things, it is not enough to just go through the motions. Consciously breathing is helping me replenish my energy, strengthen my “good practices” and make me feel like I have a solid foundation from which I can tackle the stresses that may come my way.

So now I have a new daily practice - as soon as I wake up (or whenever I need to) I stop and focus in on my breath - soft and slow breaths to start that become deeper and lower the longer I concentrate. And though I am pretty sure I knew this, I am remembering that deep, low abdominal breathing is truly transformative.    

In Harmony Tags Breathe, breathing, mental wellbeing, mindful breathing, scientific research, self-care, self-improvement, the beauty of breath, well-being, yoga
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How good are you at relaxing …or better still doing absolutely nothing?

May 25, 2016

I’ve been thinking about this for the last few weeks. So, I suppose in some ways this post is my way of asking for advice.

I have always been pretty bad at relaxing. I am definitely a “doer” so when I sit down to chill, it’s as though I have “ants in my pants”.

It takes me at least three sittings to watch a 40 minute programme on TV as I always leap up to “just something quickly”, thereby sabotaging my own relaxation.

As for actually doing nothing – I am truly abysmal. I find the theory quite appealing, but in reality doing nothing feels bewildering and slightly scary.

I’m getting rather annoyed with myself, and tired, so I need to take action, but how?

Now I am not claiming my life is any more full than anyone else’s and I have always thought of being self-employed (as I am) as a luxury, especially when you have children. I can fit things around my children’s needs and make up time elsewhere.

But the down side is I can always make up time elsewhere so I don’t factor in time to stop.

I am, however, quite good at doing things for my well-being. I meditate daily, exercise 5 times a week and my sleep is extremely precious to me.

But I have realized it’s not same.

Meditation, exercise, even sleep have a purpose. Relaxation doesn’t feel that way. And as for doing nothing - isn’t that a bit of a waste of time?

There is also the ‘maternal guilt factor’ - because just sitting down to relax or doing nothing feels lazy.

As I write this, I remember reading an article several years ago in relation to parenting, which discussed the importance and benefits of children doing nothing and how too much structure was not good for them. So I suppose the same principles can apply to adults.

So I wanted to come up with a list of things I could do to relax so I have been asking friends and here are some things they have suggested:

  1. Reading – This one should be easy. I love to read. But nowadays I rarely sit down with a book unless I’m on holiday.

  2. Watch a TV programme or film from start to finish without my laptop or phone to hand (this feels like intermediate level relaxation…)

  3. Go for a walk – just for the sake of going for a walk. I always have the best of intentions with this one, but never seem to manage to make the time.

  4. Gardening – I feel this one might be a joke as I am not known for my “green fingers” – but maybe I could sit in my garden more often…with a book??

  5. Do something restful – like sew or knit. Funnily enough I used to do both these things as a teenager…maybe it is time to dust off my sewing machine…

  6. Cook for pleasure – now I must admit I don’t really associate cooking as relaxing these days, it is more a necessity – and I’m pretty sure many mothers would agree. But as I have mentioned before I do find baking very restful, so maybe I need to make more time for that, as I’m sure it would be appreciated in my house.

So whilst this list is not looking unachievable, I have no idea where I would find the time and I suppose that is the point.We have to make the time to relax and the purpose can be that there is no purpose and that has benefits in itself....What do you think? I'd love to know your thoughts and what you do to relax.And as for actually doing nothing - that feels far too advanced for me - so I’ll have to work up to it…         

In Harmony Tags doing nothing, health benefits, relaxation, well-being

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